Picking Sexuality at Birth

“Predicting Sexuality at Birth” Hollywood has made movies about picking the traits of one’s offspring. Nature does it naturally and cruelly at times. The weakest animals die, sometimes in harsh ways and not necessarily by predators.

You ever notice how people say, “I was born this way!” Like, they always say it with conviction, like they just won a lawsuit. “See? Told ya!” But what if we actually could tell at birth? No more guesswork. No more dramatic “coming out” speeches. Just a doctor slapping your ass, taking a quick scan, and saying, “Congratulations, it’s a… uhh… well, you’ll see!”

Think about the possibilities. Parents could prepare! If your daughter’s got the gene for being a butch lesbian, you wouldn’t waste time with pink walls and tea sets. You’d get her a tool belt and a subscription to Popular Mechanics right out of the gate. Skip the frilly dresses—just issue her a flannel onesie and let her go full Rosie the Riveter at six months old.