Memo to Hollyweird, #TeamKJ, #KevinJackson

The following article, Hollywood Flops, Fake Marriages, and Fading Fame, was first published on The Black Sphere.

The Hollywood Has-Been Who Can’t Even Flop Gracefully

You mess with the bull, you get the horns. And in the Era of Trump, that lesson has been learned the hard way by Hollywood’s virtue-signaling elite.

A decade ago, bashing Republicans was easy—low-hanging fruit for the coastal elite. But then came MAGA. And suddenly, the same tired anti-conservative schtick started smelling like last week’s sushi. Stars like Taylor Swift and Beyoncé learned that crossing Trump’s base comes with consequences—empty concert seats, dwindling relevance, and a one-way ticket to Who?ville.

But it’s not just pop stars feeling the heat. Hollywood’s aging “legends” are flopping harder than a stuntman on a sugar crash. Robert De Niro, once the king of gritty mob dramas, just delivered another box-office dud with The Alto Knights, which opened to a pathetic $3.1 million—roughly the same as a moderately successful lemonade stand.

“Hailing from Warner Bros., ‘The Alto Knights’ opened to just $3.1 million domestically this past weekend, landing at number six on the charts and making for a disastrous start. The movie reportedly carries a $50 million production budget before marketing costs…”

At this point, De Niro’s only remaining audience is a handful of confused retirees who still think Goodfellas 2 might happen.

Enter George Clooney: The Man Who Thinks He’s Still a Star

If De Niro’s career is a slow-motion car crash, George Clooney’s is a clown car rolling into a ditch—loud, embarrassing, and full of empty seats.

Once upon a time, Clooney was ER’s heartthrob and Ocean’s Eleven’s slick con man. Now? He’s the guy Quentin Tarantino casually dismissed as “not a movie star.” And Tarantino wasn’t wrong.

“Quentin said something about me recently, so I’m a little irritated by him,” George admitted during a GQ feature with his fellow actor Brad Pitt.

“He did some interview where he was naming movie stars, and he was talking about you, and somebody else, and then this guy goes, ‘Well, what about George?’ He goes, ‘He’s not a movie star.’ And then he literally said something like, ‘Name me a movie since the millennium.’ And I was like, ‘Since the millennium? That’s kind of my whole fking career.’” Source

Oof. The truth hurts, Georgie.

Let’s play Tarantino’s game—name one Clooney movie post-2000 that anyone actually remembers. Gravity? Sure, but mostly because Sandra Bullock carried it. The Descendants? More like The Dull-scendantsTicket to Paradise? More like Ticket to Paralysis—a rom-com so forgettable even Clooney’s charisma (what’s left of it) couldn’t save it.

Clooney’s Box-Office Graveyard: A Tour of Failure

Clooney’s recent filmography reads like a How Not to Make a Hit Movie manual.

  • The Midnight Sky (2020) – A sci-fi snoozefest that Netflix buried faster than a mob informant. Critics called it “visually stunning but emotionally hollow”—which, coincidentally, also describes Clooney’s political takes.

  • Suburbicon (2017) – A dark comedy so unfunny it made Joker look like a Pixar film. Box office? A catastrophic $12 million against a $25 million budget.

  • Money Monster (2016) – A financial thriller that somehow made Wall Street less exciting than C-SPAN.

And let’s not forget The Monuments Men (2014), a WWII flick so dull it made Saving Private Ryan look like Fast & Furious. Clooney directed and starred in it, proving he can fail on both sides of the camera.

The Marriage Mirage: Even His Love Life is a PR Stunt

If Clooney’s career is floundering, his personal life isn’t faring much better. In 2025, he claimed in an interview that he and his wife, Amal, “never argue.”

Cue the world’s loudest eye-roll.

“For starters, some users didn’t buy that George and Amal had never argued as he’d claimed. ‘My partner and I never argue. We just don’t talk to each other for days!!’ commented one reader under the article.”

Even Meghan Markle got dragged into it, with one user quipping: “His ego is as big as Megan Markle’s. He can’t see beyond himself. Walks around like royalty.”

At this point, the only thing more fictional than Clooney’s “perfect marriage” is his relevance in Hollywood.

The Final Nail in the Coffin: Hollywood’s Woke Wake-Up Call

Clooney, De Niro, and their ilk are the canaries in Hollywood’s coal mine—gasping for air as audiences reject their preachy, out-of-touch nonsense.

The industry is getting a rude awakening: No one cares what celebrities think about politics. The box office doesn’t lie. Neither do empty concert halls. And certainly not Quentin Tarantino.

So here’s to George Clooney—a man who peaked in the ‘90s, clung to relevance through sheer force of PR, and is now fading into the sunset like a bad Netflix original.

The only question left is: Who’s next?

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